The Bride
I'm looking for a female
Who likes to share her food
Who doesn't mind a real small house
I hope I'm not being rude
She must like to take a bath
Every Sunday night
And sleep where I tell her to
Without puttin' up a fight
Must like to take long walks
And spend some time outside
A female I can talk to
And even take for a ride
She don't have to be too pretty
Looks don't matter at all
She just needs to be obedient
And hear me when I call
She must have all her teeth
In case she gets in a fight
I want her to defend herself
Anything less ain't right
I sure hope someone answers soon
But at least I know I tried
You see, my poor dog is lonely
And he really does need a bride
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