The Attack of the Translucent Blue Balls

What are these translucent blue balls doing in my dungeon-lobby? I shall chase them away with my fire-spouting stick! I'll even use my hand to summon fire, Though it gives me migraines to do so, But there are just too many translucent blue balls! Much more than last week. Ohh! The migraine...it begins. Which means my flowing Brown hair will dampen from perspiration which means I must shampoo it AGAIN (the second time today). I wish my roommate Ronald would stop staring at me From the back of our dungeon-lobby. What does he think this is, a show at the Mirage in Vegas? These are LETHAL translucent blue balls!!! I am saving Ronald's life as well as mine. I just wish he'd just shut-up about hoping to see some white tigers-- It's not funny! My head is KILLING me! Oh, great. Here comes the rest of the dungeon-apartment-complex: Harry, Darryl, Phillip, and Samantha. I should really be charging them for this. Don't they realize one translucent blue ball in the face will turn their brains into macaroni and cheese?!?! I mean for Heaven's Sakes, we all chipped in to buy Our own fire-spouting sticks! Harry lost his in the lake, Darryl left his at his Parent's house on Christmas vacation, Phillip traded his for an IPad, And Samantha is "fervently against" the usage of fire-spouting sticks Since it's "horrendous for the environment" but got one anyway so we could get the 5-stick package deal of 20% off--she can be a real Sweet heart in that sense. But honestly, bad for the environment?? You know what else is bad for the environment? TRANSLUCENT BLUE BALLS!!! I need a nap after this. And shampoo.