The Athlete, the Poet and the Reprobate
"I can't decide," she said,
"Whether you're an aesthete
Or an athlete,
A poet or a reprobate."
"Even when I'm a lout,
I'm an aesthete," he answered,
"I lure, rather than seek."
"So why do you
Need to dress up?"
"Like Ronald Firbank,
I suffer from a need
To give an outward show
Of my significance.
His lifestyle is an uncanny
Parallel
To my own young manhood.
I alienated people
Through a crippling shyness,
Which I disguised
With my violently idiosyncratic
Behaviour, wore cosmetics
And wrote novels
That reflected the luxurious
Lifestyle of a bygone age.
The sensation
Of never quite belonging
Lingered about me always;
That's why
I became an actor.
Through heavy experiences
I have built up
A stoned wall
Resistance
Against arrogance and aloofness.
I am a sophisticated cynic
With a kind heart
And a tendency towards regret."
("The Athlete, the Poet and the Reprobate" is based largely on writings created when I was about 20, and And in its original form, constituted some kind of
unfinished fantastical novel.)
Copyright © Carl Halling | Year Posted 2015
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