The Absentee Student Takes His Test

He’s never heard one lesson of this class,
but has to get a grade in history.
So he’s shown up at last, sure he will pass
the test that prior students say is easy!

He feels no need to read the test’s directions.
It uses letter symbols; he can tell
he only needs to trust his recollections
about the fifty states. He should do well!

He feels assured that Md has to be 
for Maryland, and Missouri is Mo.
It’s very clear Nebraska is Ne.
But why No? Everyone should know that NO means NO!

Ca, Pa, In; a piece of cake!
Then he sees a few that are an utter
puzzlement or just a huge mistake!
Pb, he’s sure, is only peanut butter!

Sg might be Singapore, or else Saigon.
But how are those in U.S. History?
Fr for France? Just what is going on?
The cocky guy is feeling kind of queasy.

At last he thinks to go back to the start
and read the test’s instructions. . . O M G!
The test was on the periodic chart
of elements! Wrong class. It’s Chemistry!!!

Note:
*The correct answers of the test were really
Md for Mendelevium, Mo for Molybdenum,
Ne for Neon,  No for Nobelium, Ca for Calcium,
Pa for Protactinium, In for Indium, pb for Lead,
Sg for Seaborgium and Fr for Francium (he was close on that one!)

As for me, I would stay in the history class!!!

Copyright © | Year Posted 2014



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12
Date: 4/28/2018 9:55:00 AM
As I sit here eating my breakfast of champions, instant potato flakes nuked, I wanted to thank you for your comments on "When" my first contribution on this site. I went to look for a poem of yrs to read and whoa, where to start? U r one hot poet. A teacher too?!? There's more of u to read, so I gotta get going. Thank you!!!
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Date: 4/15/2018 5:23:00 PM
pretty funny, Andrea. You had us all going.
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Date: 7/10/2015 10:01:00 PM
What a funny story! Congrats on your win, Andrea! Love, Kim
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Date: 7/7/2015 3:01:00 PM
Hi Andrea, A lovely win, Love **SKAT**
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Date: 7/7/2015 2:05:00 PM
Andrea, Congrats on your win. Always ~LINDA~
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Date: 7/7/2015 10:40:00 AM
Andie I oike your humor!!!I wish I can write easipy with such thene as oike you!~Olive Eloiaa kudos!
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Date: 7/7/2015 8:01:00 AM
Me too, congrats on your win Andrea.
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Date: 7/7/2015 3:46:00 AM
Hilarious write Andrea! Loved to read this awesome winning marvel! Big congrats!
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Date: 12/15/2014 2:25:00 AM
This one is so bright and witty Andrea!What a fun poem to read I would have missed most of them, I am much better at History too. I really admire the creativity you put into this one. LOL
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Date: 12/14/2014 2:09:00 AM
Hahahaha - loved this one! Those periodic symbols were always so confusing! Like AU for gold and K for potassium?? What is going on, here? Thanks for the chuckle.
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Date: 12/12/2014 8:52:00 PM
I loved history. I sucked at English though. Funny because my English teachers all thought I should be a writer. Hahaa. They were probably right.
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Date: 12/12/2014 4:41:00 PM
Cute one..Reminds me of an old song "Don't know much biology nor about the French I took"..Ha!!..Some students are so precocious or so it seems until they take the test..Thanks for the visit to my page..Sara
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Date: 12/12/2014 9:36:00 AM
I agree with you, history is much more interesting than chemistry. In school I went to class unprepared but I don't think I ever went to the wrong class.
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Date: 12/11/2014 1:56:00 AM
Excellent. Priceless write. Fun and creative too. Enjoyed. Tfs
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Date: 12/10/2014 12:23:00 PM
so, so funny Andrea totally love it superb pen and it is England hugs
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Date: 12/10/2014 10:25:00 AM
What a nightmare that would have been. I've had tests that were so hard it was like I wasn't in class, but I showed up at every class. Just not that smart I guess. You had me reading to the end to figure out what was going on.
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Date: 12/10/2014 9:17:00 AM
This is fun Andrea!
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Date: 12/9/2014 6:00:00 PM
This poem deserves an A, for Andrea. Lot of fun and creative and with twists and turns. Good luck in the contest!
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Date: 12/9/2014 5:55:00 PM
lol...a lot of trick questions on that test....Nicely pen ned Andrea
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Date: 12/9/2014 12:28:00 PM
i love the way this poem unfolded...I'd've stayed in the history class, too.
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Date: 12/9/2014 9:14:00 AM
Knowing the male mind, I believe he was more interested in Mary Jane than class! Nicely done Andrea!!
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Date: 12/9/2014 8:32:00 AM
Maybe he can work at the mill and grind his career to a halt. For I think he'll get by, making whole wheat and rye. Doesn't grain have a pinch of salt? :) Very entertaining piece Andrea. Peace. :)
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Date: 12/9/2014 7:55:00 AM
Simply priceless Andrea - I hope this does so so well for you :-) Hugs jan xxx
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Date: 12/9/2014 7:09:00 AM
You are one smart cookie. You have now set the bar for this contest. Excellent! A Fav!
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Date: 12/9/2014 3:53:00 AM
Brings to mind the song...don't know much about history..don't know much biology... Funny...I used to have those test dreams in college.
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12
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