Tears of a Hero

Tears of a hero Tears of a hero, they say I supposed to be a tough guy..So I can’t let the tears show. But with these feelings I’m having its getting hard to conceal though. 8 years on the force, 23 years of age when I started…I was just a kid trying to find my way, with a kid on the way. Road map was uncharted. Little did I know the journey I was embarking would be a long hard journey, but a rewarding journey I must add. Although here lately the things I been seeing...have been making me sad. But they said I’m supposed to be a tough guy…so I can’t let the tears show. But with these feelings I’m having it’s getting harder to conceal though. Playing dual roles, on the streets I protect and serve with honor. At home none of that matters, I’m just a husband and a father. Raising my 2 young ones teaching them right from wrong. They love me with or without the uniform. They don’t know they are those who hate me..Because I wear the uniform. I chose this job for a reason, I wanted to make a difference you could see. Although sometimes it seems the person needing help…is me. But they said I supposed to be a tough guy so I can’t let the tears show, with the feelings I’m having it’s getting harder to conceal though. I’m referred to as the officer in blue, often times forgetting I’m a human just like you/ they say I’m emotionless and seem so detached. But listen the emotions are there…just suppressed. Working nights calling home to my lovely wife just to say “hey baby, I may be home late”. Her reply “just please…make it home safe”. I put my life on the line but it’s cool because…that’s what I signed up for. To serve and protect, put my right hand on the bible, that’s what I swore. But the memories and images of the things I have seen are sometimes hard to ignore. But they said I supposed to be a tough guy so I can’t let the tears show. These feelings I’m having they getting harder to conceal though. You see..I don’t get praise for all that I do. That’s ok but it hurts when things are said about me that are so untrue. We are living in a time where perception is reality and police brutality is perceived as a common normality which is a fallacy but the media deceives so you can’t see the actuality. Understand I’m an officer….but I’m a black man too. Behind the badge.. I hurt like you. They said I’m supposed to be a tough guy......But I got to let these tears flow.