Survived

I’m looking straight ahead And I see you up ahead Looking good Like a winking sprite With a winning smile Acting as if everything is alright While spinning yarn to twist my arm And bring me down I say go ahead Play your game inside my head Start the freak show Show me what there is to show So I know what there is to know I’m all eyes I could do this all life I’m never going to ask why But this I’ll try How do you sleep at night? I’m fighting hard, almost holding steady I’ll tell you when I’m ready I have to agree Your levels are too high, top speed So fast I can’t compete My game is incomplete Wait up, I’m taking a break To catch a breath I’m burning inside Hurting so badly I could cry It’s the truth and I won’t lie I’m nursing deep cuts Internal injuries Not the kind treatable with a bandage Because it’s deep, deep inside The wound is confined And what’s worse, you see While the competition is breeding I’m held in consternation, bleeding For me it’s never easy I’ve got to keep on breathing In the end I did what I could And here’s what I did I managed to stop the bleeding Put some ice over the bruises And now I’m pouring wine Over the wound To stop this thing from becoming putrid I’ve been a fool But now I’m cool I can’t find the idiom to emphasize it Yes, I’ve been an idiot It’s all public knowledge All the same I’m trying to forget it It’s water under the bridge Last night I dreamed of you In the field of dreams I dreamed you were eating food Drinking booze And over the top feeling good Celebrating I threw my hands in the air I’m vanquished My mind’s a prison And deep inside its cells I languish There is no fight left in me And no reason to lie There is this also, this Dimming and flickering starlight In the distant night You said though out of sight I’d never be out of mind But from where I am standing You are already advertising