Suicide 16
The world has always felt so ineffably massive
As a child I was scared to grow up; to live
I thought about meaningless existence and absurd hypotheticals way beyond my age
From that childlike wonder I learned to cry silently
In two days, however, I will turn 16 years old
But I have always thought that I would’ve died a year ago
No one ever knew, I made sure they didn’t
But this past year I forced myself into things I can’t do in the ground
I have learned to soar far above my fleeting grave
For my “suicide 16” will be no more
I used my voice and met amazing people
I have cried tears of joy from laughing too loud
I’ve been fighting the urge to starve myself
This “suicide 16” will not take me
So long as I take that first step into freedom,
The world won’t be as scary
For now, I choose to challenge the everyday
I have proved I am capable of being human
As cowardice and determination are seen as weakness,
They aren’t weak, they are human.
Humanly real unlike my premature grave
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