Suggested Epitaphs

Now, I'm a very average and simple guy, But, doggone it, when it comes my time to die, I'd like a nice epitaph etched upon my stone, To fondly remember me by when I'm gone! Here are a few suggestions for you to mull over, When I cease to function and am planted 'neath the clover. You are at liberty to pick and choose any one. If needed, form a committee to get the job done! "He always enjoyed a fine cigar; He passed on ere too much tar!" "Upon my stone let no bird alight; If they do, please clean off the blight!" "If you think this place has no appeal; How the heck do you think I feel!" "Old Bob owns this piece of real estate; But no one has seen him as of late!" Folks it's up to you to make a selection. Just remember me with fond affection. Choose whatever you think fits me best, Then leave me alone to enjoy my rest!