Eric Shuler Poet Free verse

Suffocate

I wanted our ending
to fall gently—
like the last leaf of autumn
that lets go without bitterness.
I never wanted storms between us,
no bad karma
following the memory of your name.
Just peace…
and the quiet understanding
that once, for a moment,
we tried.
Because I did like you.
More than that—
I cared for you in ways
I never hid.
There was a time
when I stood at the edge of loving you,
looking out at the possibility
of something deeper,
something real.
I was willing to walk that road.
But some paths
are filled with signs
we try too hard not to read.
The lies that arrived
dressed as small truths.
The nights where alcohol
spoke louder than honesty.
The petty storms
that came from nowhere
and left cracks in the ground
we were trying to build on.
I tried to look past them.
I really did.
But some things
don’t just happen once—
they begin to feel like character,
like pieces of a person
not yet ready to grow.
And growth…
real growth
takes time.
For us to reach something healthy,
it would have taken
a sudden change of seasons.
And I don't think
you were there yet.
Still,
don’t ever think
my feelings weren’t real.
Because they were.
I liked you.
I cared about you.
And somewhere along the way
a quiet part of my heart
began to love you.
But love
cannot breathe
when trust keeps suffocating.
I could never shake the feeling
that other conversations
lived in the shadows
while honesty stood outside the door
waiting to be let in.
And when doubt becomes the air
between two people,
even the strongest connection
struggles to survive.
So I leave you now
without anger,
without hate.
Only acceptance.
I wish you peace.
I wish your son
a beautiful life
full of guidance and light.
And as for us—
we will simply become
two people
who once stood close enough
to almost love each other…
but not close enough
to survive the truth.

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