Home » Poems » Jack Jordan » So Very Quiet

So Very Quiet

It’s so very quiet
my ears hum hum 
with the music 
my head makes 
when there’s 
nothing happening
inside or out there
where it’s cold 
and my telephone never rings.

depressionfree verse

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Timothy Hicks

Date: 3/9/2013 12:04:00 PM

I like how you open up the mind with that last line... just what sort of important phone call are you expecting? Is someone in the hospital, are you waiting for someone to say you got the job? Poetry is more powerful to me when poets use simple images to express big ideas. Where you let the images themselves do the talking instead of overtly descriptive words. This seems to be your style, I like it.

Jack Jordan
Date: 3/9/2013 1:23:00 PM

Thanks again. Frequently I just start writing without a goal or theme in mind. I have no idea where I wil end up. The next task is to get rid of the junk, leaving the kernel of an idea. It's a fun process for me, and relieves the burden of writing on a given topic. Thanks for reading.

Heather Ober

Date: 3/6/2013 7:57:00 AM

This one is very powerful. The last line really hits the reader. And "the music my head makes" - I love that.

Jack Jordan
Date: 3/6/2013 8:40:00 AM

Thanks! J

Donna Jones

Date: 2/10/2013 7:52:00 PM

Its true...nothing is louder than the quiet where you can hear your heartbeat in your brain it seems....I hate it! Interesting poem

Jack Jordan
Date: 2/10/2013 8:13:00 PM

I don't like it either, although the older I am, the more I appreciate the quiet.

Dan Kearley

Date: 2/10/2013 7:09:00 PM

((Ring!!)) ((Ring!!)) Hello! :o) Hi Jack! How are you doing?I see your writing some very fine poetry....I just thought I'd drop you a line and let you know this world is filled with loving people who like to talk..But it seems nobody has got the time? You take it easy...And give me a call sometime...I can only hope this may help cheer you up a little bit. :o)

Jack Jordan
Date: 2/10/2013 8:20:00 PM

Thanks for the compliment. I'm absolutely going to have to learn to write pieces that don't make it seem I'm in the depths of gloom. Far from it. I am a bit of a pessimist, I've been told, so perhaps that's where it comes from.

So Very Quiet

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