Kaitlyn Avery Poet Free verse

Silhouette

You say you want a girl who can hold a meaningful conversation.
But what did we do every night until 3 a.m.?
You say you want a real “connection.”
But how long have we known each other?
I’m just not your type?
No. I’m just not your size.
I’m not the silhouette that would make your mother proud
or your friends jealous.
And that’s what you want, isn’t it?
You want it all,
but you want it without the work.
Had you stopped for a moment to think,
appearances change.
Weight is lost. Weight is gained.
And if what was on the inside truly mattered to you,
maybe you would’ve already been happy.
I was enough when no one else was around.
I was enough when she didn’t reply.
I was only enough
with your eyes closed
and the shades drawn shut.
But I disappeared with the morning light.
I loved you.
I let myself believe I could be enough
if you would just open your eyes.
Just once.
Because I loved you.
But as time went on,
and you kept me hidden, kept me chained,
I grew to hate who I was.
Waiting by the door.
Waiting for your call.
Shutting myself off from everyone else
because of you.
Until waiting became withering.
Until my sight became as twisted as yours.
Until I didn’t recognize myself
without you.
Without me.

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