Sick Thoughts

I wondered if owls became depressed And if they ever cry Then instead of saying who They just wondered why If a man pulls pickles from a jar At his place of work Does he become a pickle plucker Or a gherkin jerk My marriage lasted forty years It's been a lot of fun The reason I'm still living is My wife don't own a gun When she calls me honey dew I really get suspicious Because it's honey dew the ironing Or honey dew the dishes When something needs fixing at my house I do it right away Why put off until tomorrow What you can screw up today Thanks to genetic research The future's bright it shows You'll be able to choose your children's ears And even pick their nose.