Sewage Breath, from THE WOMAN WHO COULD EAT WOOD

Sewage Breath He doesn’t see his family and is barred from all jobs that have strict high personal hygiene rules. It was his fault. His shocking sewage breath makes people vomit pools. That, of course, made him intensely angry and too sad. Every day he felt for having sewage breath, for making people sick, extremely bad. There was nothing he could do. Brushing his teeth with toothpaste ten times a day never once got rid of that worst smell ever that kept every one at bay. Before vomiting the doctor said, ‘Um, the cause you were born with it. Because ... Kidney disease isn’t the cause. Diabetes or something else isn’t the cause. There’s no explanation for the cause.’ So as to make amends the police had to hire Sewage Breath to work in the coast mountain sewers, and ten times he said, ‘Thank You.’ His job was to breath on the drug dealers so they’d spew. Thousands of drugs were seized. Thousands of lives were saved. Yahoo! Sewage Breath felt calm and happy. He felt so so so good for first time. Yahoo! Though the public and his family were so so so proud of him they decided that because his sewage breath was never going to go from him, it’d be better he live in the sewers, better for them and him.