Save Me From Synthetic Hell
Save me, Cotton, save me, O,
from the Polyester foe.
Shield me with your porous weave
on back and neck and chest and sleeve
lest I be trapped and worn to bits
by Acetates and Double-knits
that tease and taunt with silken flair
yet hide their poison: WASH AND WEAR.
Blessed Linen, Wool and Silk,
the likes of which are mother's milk
please keep me in your sacred shell
and save me from synthetic hell.
I come prepared with iron and board
as any knight with shield and sword
and would remain pure and chaste(though lonely)
if I could but read the words: DRY CLEAN ONLY.
On bended knee I plead, I beg
(while nursing an arthritic leg)
keep me save and free from harm
beneath your oh-so-natural arm.
If this aid you are ill to rend
I would settle for a blend.
P.S. But absolutely me no wanna
that vile nylon called, Qiana!
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