Jared Pickett Poet Ghazal

Random Thoughts *39* the Ghazal

Interested, I approach slowly with these incited thoughts;
Lately, she torments my daydreams, stimulating such excited thoughts.

Tonight could be a good night, we may grow collectively. 
A benefits package for me? she leaves me with these ignited thoughts.

No quarrels with the time I get in, how I dress, how I look with this afro. I'm
Straying, I'm embracing another. This morning I left her with unrequited thoughts.

This secret affair, my benefits package best kept protected, on the down-low.
We developed slow. Enemies turned lovers can be such a delighted thought.

I sought, thought I found love, that bought heartache. I strayed because I'm 
Miserable most days, dark and gloomy. She is my escape from these blighted thoughts.


Jared Pickett
02/14/2010
Asavvy1

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Debbie Guzzi April 1, 2010 at 5:37 PM Is the rhyme pattern..incited/excited(a,a)grow/ignited (b,a)afro/unrequited (c,a) down/delighted (d,a) because/blighted(e,a)? Jared Pickett February 24, 2014 at 8:46 AM The inline rhyme precedes the refrain in lines 1 & 2, then every second line. AA,bA,cA,dA, etc!! I did however make some errors that I intend on fixing with this new Ghazal coming soon. Thank you for pointing them out!!Asavvy1

Carolyn Devonshire April 1, 2010 at 3:37 PM Jared, I have been trying to research the Ghazal and am very confused by the "refrain." Is the word "thoughts" in itself considered the refrain in your poem? I like this poem and the form; I just have problems understanding what I've been reading about Ghazals. You do pick tough ones, eh? But with some guidance, we'll rise to the challenge. Love, Carolyn

Debbie Guzzi April 1, 2010 at 6:59 AM Ok Jared I do not see this as fulfilling the requirements of a Ghazal? Where's the refrain? Where and what is the meter? I can't write one if I don't understand what it is? I'm researching.(Of course it is an excellent verse..we are just talking form & to me it looks like free verse broken into 2 line groupings?

Doris Culverhouse April 1, 2010 at 4:17 AM so you mean the excited, blighted? Oh I see now! Thanks.

Amy Thompson February 17, 2010 at 2:06 PM Dear Jared your last poem is very powerful and well written. I read the two before that as well, and assume that you are enjoying a secret relationship. Whatever the case, two beautiful poems ensued. Well done! Love, Amy.

Carol Sunshine Brown February 15, 2010 at 12:05 PM Thank you for sharing your poetry with us today Jared. I enjoyed reading it. Love, Carol

Charmaine Chircop February 15, 2010 at 6:36 AM Its nice to escape...to that place where we feel safe..beautiful verses Jared..Charma

Robert A. Dufresne February 15, 2010 at 3:44 AM You sure know alot of poetry forms and know how to use them. Good job, my friend.-Robert

Robert A. Dufresne February 15, 2010 at 3:43 AM You sure know alot of poetry forms and know how to use them. Good job, my friend.-Robert

Kim Hilliker February 14, 2010 at 7:13 PM Tells a story with a few words. We all need an escape. Enjoy.

Linda-Marie Sweetheart February 14, 2010 at 7:01 PM Escape is a good thing ... like this poetry form .. it fits your write tonight.. must be this "luv" thing day.. HVD to u.. just posted two myself on same subject matter.. see ..great minds do think alike.. I like this one.. "Sweetheart" with luv..