Questions of An Alcoholic
They say one drink wears off in an hour
But what if it's a fishbowl whiskey sour
You were supposed to share, but chose to devour
They say a glass of wine is good for your heart
What size is a glass, is there a chart
Does it count if you have 6 beers before you start
I've heard that tea is full of antioxidants
Does the name "Long Island" make a difference
Tell me now so I can prepare my defense
I'm sure you've heard that you shouldn't drink alone
But what if your talking on the phone
Or your dog, Charlie, is always at home
I think all of this is just too much math
Perhaps I'll take my crown royal to the bath
I'll contemplate the consequences with a laugh
I won't drink the whole bottle, only half
I'll record my intake later, complete with a graph
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