Black Eyed Susan Poet Dizain

Prolonged Exposure

I’ve covered the mirrors in our house
With colored sheets, while choking on grief
Black, blue, and green, to my bewildered spouse
Who has wondered what has become of me
And why suddenly I’ve begun mourning

He thinks that I’m a reflection of him
So he doesn’t notice the wounds within
The marring of my spirit’s complexion
Permanent, from his reoccurring sins
That have shaped me into his perfection

My face is clear so you would never guess
That person staring back isn’t me
Mirrors can’t show underlying distress
Only the lie he wants others to see
Not the despair slowly growing, steeping

Don’t look bewildered at my draping sheets
If you look, the nude is there, underneath
Reflecting the lie that it has become
Prolonged exposure to fisting complete
Now mourning the death of someone it loved


5/8-5/9/12
For "Your Birthday Suit" Contest

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Cecilia Macfarlane May 17, 2012 at 7:42 PM Enthralling write....your bared your soul with this one Susan....Many congrats!

Elliott Bowe The Drunken Poet May 17, 2012 at 8:34 AM STUPENDOUS WRITE!!! My favorite lines is,The marring of my spirit’s complexion Permanent, from his reoccurring sins That have shaped me into his perfection.

Elliott Bowe The Drunken Poet May 17, 2012 at 8:34 AM STUPENDOUS WRITE!!! My favorite lines is,The marring of my spirit’s complexion Permanent, from his reoccurring sins That have shaped me into his perfection.

Cyndi Macmillan May 16, 2012 at 7:58 PM Susan, this poem blew me out of the water! Belated congrats, I'm sending, with a genuine thank you for letting inspiration take you where IT wanted to take you. By the way, loved the last stanza the most, especially the sophisticated rhyme scheme that used both internal rhyme and such lovely assonance (a subject I would like to address in my next devices blog... sigh... if I can find time!) hugs to you hon, chin up and stay true to your muse. Trust your personal style ... ;-) Cyndi

Poet Destroyer A May 16, 2012 at 4:28 PM Hi, Susan, your poem is perfect... don't change a word. Add all the ING~ you want... Life is like a mirror always waiting to be seen. I love what life accomplishes ..once it's all completed...lol.... love the last 2 lines the most... sorry~ I was commenting on Nathan's comments on the bottom.. . We are WAR-ING right now. always~ The Poet Destroyer

Andrea Dietrich May 15, 2012 at 8:47 PM and thanks so much for reading my poems today. I don't think you have a new one for me to see. Luv, Andrea

Andrea Dietrich May 15, 2012 at 8:46 PM Susan, you asked what was wrong with Abelard putting love away. WEll, here is the tragedy of their love story. The uncle got mad at him for getting Heloise pregnant so he had some guys sneak up on Abelard and castrate him. In the end, he decided to just become a monk or priest or something, and Heloise became a nun (though she couldn't get into it the way Abelard gave himself to being a monk). REad "Stealing Heaven" It is so fascinating.

Connie Marcum Wong May 15, 2012 at 3:05 PM Wow! Very profound poem Susan. I wish I couldn't relate, but I empathize and find it cathartic to express these kind of feelings most of us are exposed to in a lifetime. I hope this was created for the contest and not from your personal experiences. Blessings, and thank you for your comment. Connie Marcum Wong May 15, 2012 at 3:08 PM I forgot to Congratulate you on your super win!

Rhonda Johnson-Saunders May 13, 2012 at 12:39 PM Discovering Congrats on your win in Cyndi's contest Susan. Your poem was my favorite on the winners list. It is powerful, honest and emotive. I have read it many times and keep discovering something new I love. This one goes to my faves and you are one of my favorite poets. God bless you, Rhonda Rhonda Johnson-Saunders May 13, 2012 at 12:41 PM I have no idea why "discovering" came out before congrats. I think my kindle has a mind of its own. Sorry....

Dinda Minardi May 12, 2012 at 7:49 AM A very dark and powerful poem, Susan. Congrats on the big win.

Kathryn Collins May 12, 2012 at 6:17 AM this is riveting Susan. love, Kathy

Joseph May May 12, 2012 at 5:27 AM congrats on your win Susan

Andrea Dietrich May 11, 2012 at 7:49 PM YAAAYYYY, it's so good to see this high on the list, Susan. Did you see her blog where she showed your poem with the other top placed ones? Congrats my friend!

Kash Poet May 11, 2012 at 7:41 PM Congratulations Susan on your win with this beautiful poem.

Carol Sunshine Brown May 11, 2012 at 7:20 AM Congratulations on your win in Cyndi's "Your Birthday Suit" contest Susan. Love, Carol

Mandy Tams The Golden Girl May 11, 2012 at 4:49 AM Congratulation on your birthday suit win Susan xx

David Williams May 11, 2012 at 2:56 AM Susan congrats on your win..David

Nathan D. May 10, 2012 at 9:05 AM he he he sorry i am practicing my poetry critiquing and you one of many victims today so if i did bad dont hold it against me. i do like the poem and like all the others i am smitten with the face so clear you woulndt know it wasn't me. thanks for stopping by and supporting me best wishes to you and yours and the avatar is a baby i once tried to eat i will post the pic of it when i got it in the pot Nathan D. May 17, 2012 at 4:23 PM shut up and get back in the kitchen. Poet Destroyer A May 16, 2012 at 4:24 PM It's funny Susan, if i were to comment like this on a males poem... I would never hear the end of it. But, yet he can charm you and talk to you on a comment... Gosh, I'm gonna go and call every man on the soup, my next victim... lets see how he likes it.... xox Poet Destroyer A May 16, 2012 at 4:20 PM you are so stupid Nathan.... Susan, that picture is my granddaughter. He fell in love with the picture and asked if he could use it.

Nathan D. May 10, 2012 at 9:03 AM i would change the last line of the first stanza to something like "And why I have suddenly begun to mourn" the ing ending just seems out of place to me which leads me to the growing, steeping ending of the third stanza. it displeases me. the ing again is out of place but double so since its follows an ing word. i would drop the comma and steeping and add an adjative instead of another verb. Poet Destroyer A May 16, 2012 at 4:18 PM lol, he's always asking me for help...

Andrea Dietrich May 9, 2012 at 4:20 PM I agree with Marlon here. The part about the face so clear. ... that whole third stanza is so profound. Very different work from you, Susan. It's Dizan, huh? Unique!

David Williams May 9, 2012 at 10:34 AM Susan cool take on the theme, good luck..David

Leo Larry Amadore May 9, 2012 at 8:49 AM Very nicely done...a deep and intensely emotional piece...I enjoyed reading your poem today!