Pastiche Pleasures

She feels like chicken tonight With Marmite toast A welcome break From green roast A pound on the hip You need to lose Squeeze your achnes And purchase a bra Trigonometry Is her heart's desire And Shakespeare's prose Squeeze your achnes And purchase a bra Echoes in her ears Your suitor In the parlour The only gal To know her alphabet A kindly neighbour Taught her to read "Schools are for the city folks Oriantel dance and Amorous prose You need to learn! We need your dowry; Your daddy is in his death bed." Her mama said "This is the gypsy way For a millennia!" So she keeps her hips slim And masters amorous prose A fool she was not; She elopes To the bright lights of the city A job in the café Then night schools Learning Shakespeare's prose