Paranoid Or Normal

I see you respond to a comment with a like or laugh, mine wasn’t acknowledged I see you getting together with friends, I wasn’t included I write texts that go unanswered and calls never returned. I sit In the dark reading books distracting myself from my own thoughts I wonder if others think these thoughts or if they are mine alone. I wonder silently if I disappeared would anyone notice I think I could be better but don’t want to try I look at the ceiling and it has a stopping point Do I ?