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On Rainy Days

On rainy days my heart opens
Like a flower with fragile petals
Raindrops collect on my soul
To be shed as tears the next day

But though my emotions are volatile
I scapegoat my lack of social graces
By complaining about my eye problem
Instead of facing the hard truth

There is some truth to my claim
That my eye indeed causes pain
But the reality is I'm afraid
To let people in

My heart is a hermit
Previously beaten and left broken
But it has a metallic shell
To protect if from further damage

And I keep hoping
Someone will break it open
But the reality is
I'm the only one who can

I'll never overcome my anxiety
By dabbling in poison and confirmation bias
Nor will I do so by digging deeper
Into the despair I hold inside

With courage I can survive
With passion I can thrive
And each day I can strive
To see my hope revived

I don't know if God awaits when I die
And though I claim to be Atheist
I'd like to think He's up there
Watching me begin to shine

But the biggest revelation of all
Is my recovery starts with me
And I don't have time to wait to be saved
So I'll pick myself up

I'll face the world with renewed vigor
And pursue my passions with fervent fervor
And rainy days will no longer hamper
My hopes on this great endeavor

On rainy days my heart opens
Like a flower with radiant petals
Raindrops collect on my soul
To water the fruits of my garden tomorrow

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019

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Date: 2/11/2019 7:42:00 AM
Tremendous poem Christopher, so self-aware. I love the way you reprise the first verse as the last, very effective. Great job.
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Christopher Goss
Date: 2/11/2019 11:41:00 AM
Thank you!