Old Women Make Me Horny

(This is a fictional poem) I'm a twenty-five year old man and I've been told that I'm weird. People say I've become a nut just like they feared. They were shocked because it's ridiculous and silly. I get an ******** when I see Granny on the Beverly Hillbillies. Pamela Anderson called me and asked me out but I refused to meet her. Sexy women like her give me a limp peter. Old broads are the only women who arouse me. I choke my chicken every time I watch Aunt Bee. My friends ask me if I'm going to take a wife. I tell them that I'd love to marry that old fat lady on the facts of life. Last week I mailed a letter to the publisher of Playboy. I told Hefner that he should make a new magazine and call it Grayboy.