Oh Dear, What Can the Matter Be

Oh Dear, What Can The Matter Be


Oh Dear, what can the matter be
the mirrors all lie – they never flatter me

all they see is a much larger – fatter me
they should be charged with reflective battery

I think the wash shrunk my favorite top
for when I inhale – the buttons pop off

Oh Dear, the jeans in the glass
cannot be mine – just look at that ass

it cannot be true – there must be a flaw
there’s double the chin beneath a slack jaw

Oh Dear, look at that matted coif
I started teasing and just couldn’t stop

Dear, dear, it just isn’t fair
that reflection - it’s perfectly clear

full of looking glass malice
a “Rabbit Hole” palace
that tortured poor Alice

Oh Dear, what can the matter be
why must I seek flat glass flattery



2/1/2018

submitted to – Oh Dear, What Can The Matter Be – Poetry Contest
sponsor – Barry Stebbings
Copyright © | Year Posted 2018

Poem

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Haight Avatar
February 22, 2018 at 9:46 AM
Love your poem, John! Made me laugh this morning! Well-done and congrats on your fine win. Sandra :)
Smith Avatar
February 17, 2018 at 10:44 AM
Must be one of those side show mirrors, congratulations John...
Roper Avatar
February 16, 2018 at 11:40 PM
Congratulations on your win John!
Wolf Avatar
February 16, 2018 at 4:04 PM
Perfect! My sentiments exactly! They say that mirrors don't lie---but couldn't they just fib a little?!...Congratulations on a well-deserved winner. Peals of laughter from this one! Best of everything, Gershon
Stebbings Avatar
February 16, 2018 at 9:03 AM
Congratulation on your win, John. The mirror never lies!!
Turner Avatar
February 2, 2018 at 8:38 AM
Embrace it John. It is, what it is. lol Very funny! Good luck!
Lawless Avatar
February 2, 2018 at 3:27 PM
embrace it.....i'd rather erase it....
Allison Avatar
February 1, 2018 at 5:05 PM
priceless humour John it really made me giggle:-) hugs jan xx
Lawless Avatar
February 1, 2018 at 7:30 PM
glad you got a chuckle out of this one Jan
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