image from modernpest.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Oh, small gray squirrel with paws swift and horrific, your crimes against Christmas stir outrage mythic. Every December, the same dang fight~ you gnaw through our twinkling strands of light. We’ve duct-taped. We’ve sprayed. We’ve begged you to cease; yet, you chomp with a rodent’s relentless mouthpiece. Your tiny teeth, sharper than Scrooge’s spite, leave our lawn a dark, half-lit blight. Next year, we’ll rig traps large and unbenign or string the lights with razor wire design. But deep down we know—you’ll win this war, one chewed-up bulb at a time, you anarchic piece of forest lore.
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