Nothing Unusual About My Pets

Nothing unusual about my pets he told me. I wondered about this as I stared at Germany. Germany, his lab, had an abnormal right eyeball. It seemed twice as large as the other one, and it was milked over. Did anything odd ever happen to Germany? I asked Oliver. Oliver is twelve, and nonchalant about everything. Not really, he said. He’s perfectly normal except he got hit by lightning a couple of times and he is blind in one eye. What about your cat, Loki, I asked him. Anything unusual about her? No. She is perfectly normal except she wants clothes. Does she wear them? No. She eats them. As I watch her devour a pair of panties I think “there is nothing to see here.”