My Trophy Deer - Not
When I was home from college one time
Waiting for me was a friend of mine
Who said “Let’s go on a hunt?”
“There’s a place near here where we can go
I know it has bucks as well as doe
At six, I’ll be parked out front!”
A deer hunt you say, that would be fun
Don’t have a rifle, but have a shotgun
Think that’s OK?
“I think that’s the best thing you could choose
A slug or buck-shot is what I use
So you want to go or stay?”
I’m game to go; I’ll see ya at six
There’s gear to find and a lunch to fix
I think my Dad has buck-shot
Shells had been stowed in an old bird cage
Buck-shot was there that said twelve gauge
Now what I needed, I got
At six the next day, we’re on our way
He said, “A deer blind’s where you’ll stay
Seeking a thrill
Climb a tree, into the blind for me
As the sun came up, soon I could see
Excitement builds
With the woods on left, right, and rear
The right-of-way in front was very clear
Open shot for me
I started to nap, a twig did snap
Could be a deer walking into my trap?
Alert as can be
I could faintly see, behind a tree
But is that deer a he or a she?
Is this is my day?
I was hoping, it’d move in the opening
Telling myself, “Don’t start chocking”
A trophy came my way
Slowly I raised the gun and took aim
This shot is so easy, it’s a shame
I gave the trigger a squeeze
Instead of a BANG, I got a POOF
What the hell happened, where did I goof
Shot rolled out by my knees
Those shells were wet or would have been louder
It won’t hurt the cap, but ruins the powder
I had a story to tell
When I told my friend what happened there
He laughed so hard, he fell from his chair
Not funny, go to hell!
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