Tebogo Phaladi Cornelia Phooko | + Follow Poet |
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My Mother's Favorite Child

His black sheep
Dark skinned, a chubby with brown eyes
Hair so fluffy, as he wished it was blonde.
Ugly to his eyes, even more pigchunky
That even blows off my confidence
I tried acting bubbly but her pain crushed my spirit

I've been boiling an ocean,
His critics as he keeps raising
Leaving me in the cold
His only daughter I am,
I don't even understand how He throws me with a hatred blanket

Managing to call me stupid in every silly mistakes I make
And yet fail to recognize every good thing I make
My existence he makes me question

Literally he brings gloom to my room,
But i try to bloom,
For her sake yes
Course she is the rose in my garden
That she born me in her womb, does not pass her thought
Unlike "he" whom I even feel like addressing as a sperm donor
Course a father figure he failed in me

I am my mother's favorite child and yet my father's worst daughter
With reasons I don't know
Only if I wasn't excelling at school perhaps,
But, I am fortunately an A student
And Among my peers I'm the brightest, 
And yes, I'm not an excellent athlete but I do best.

Only if I deliver rotten potatoes at him perhaps,
But I only clothe my words and actions with honor
Hence, I'm still trying to wrap my head around the hatred,
Course I see myself as a blessing, 
And it hurts how he treats me as a sin
It is all depressing and now I'm confessing

I'm up a creek without a paddle
This is all toxic, and my mind is still processing
How He constantly scold me for no reasons
At all it makes no sense to me
How he keeps playing snug as a bug in a rug
Day after day, Season after season
It seems he never want to bury the hatchet

Im getting a blow off my steam
And I keep wishing this was all a dream
This is my naked pain
And I feel suffocated
Now show me yours,
Show me your naked pain

Copyright © Tebogo Phaladi Cornelia Phooko | Year Posted 2022

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