My Losing Struggle With Not So Easy Chair

My losing struggle with not so easy "chair" buoyed me aloft beyond outer limits of the twilight zone where dark shadows lurked along green acres creating hee haw sounds. Aforementioned adventure occurred countless years ago, nevertheless psychological repercussions persist to this April eighteenth two thousand and twenty three. I admit not to be that personality type, who takes seat of the pants dare devilish death defying acts, but remains on the straight and true, yet still quite aware, a series of unfortunate events may arise clear out of the blue, no matter the weather temperate, moderate and fair nonetheless, this rather innocuous no sweat whim methought to raise cushioned "supposedly knob intending for height adjustable" comfortable office chair, thus fingers toyed with this, that, or another lever (envision finger pointing under padding for rear), thus nonchalantly, I blindly jiggled one hand size pedal appurtenance after another, when lo and behold whew ohhh....nooo..., whoo ahh, way up into the rarefied atmosphere, yours truly did unexpectedly vertically set sail way past the timberline, then OUCH each ear snapped, crackled, and popped, then suddenly this chap buoyed aloft, went temporarily deaf, oh no..., now get this aside being unable to hear the sun at high altitude creating blinding glare, meanwhile propulsive thrust sent me career ring at light speed, whereat at the least one shiver ran down my spine raising each small hair, but the biggest fright arose upon just missing (by the skin of my teeth), hence reason I wear dentures colliding into a Lear jet, no doubt the pilot, (and motley crue) near lee went berserk (indicated by the dramatically erratic flight pattern), which did appear to shrink in size mere lee, the rapid transit, which wind shear felt like a bajillion pounds per square inch of pressure tear ring, pushing, and pulling my body in all directions pirouetting me like a whirling dervish spinning ever farther distant from Earth by many a light year!