MY EXISTENCE

MY EXISTENCE (AMY)

I walk into the graveyard and see “Amy” on your stone,
And know from family hist’ry you’re not lying there alone.
She was not my mother but I can’t help but know
I owe my whole existence to the mother there below.

Amy was expecting, her first child on its way.
She took a spell as people said away back in that day.
The doctor came by buggy, few autos way back then.
No telephone to call him in the year nineteen and ten.

The doctor came into the room and in a solemn voice,
Said I cannot save them both, you have to make a choice.
“The mother by all means”, my future father said,
Then waited for the verdict, room filled with hope and dread.

But the doctor was unable to rescue either one.
He had no help to save them, surgeon far away in town.
He conveyed the dreadful news, his lack of skill confessed.
Said that he was sorry, he had done his very best.

They laid Amy in her grave for her eternal rest,
Her stillborn child still with her, placed upon her breast.
I can’t imagine father’s pain as they were lowered down,     
His wife and child and future disappearing underground.

I’m so sorry for you Amy, you deserved a better fate.
Your whole life lay before you, so many paths to take.         
A half built house reminder, still left for him to see.      
I’m sorry that you had to die so that there could be me.

All the chapters in my life would not have taken place.
All the people that I knew, others in their space. 
A trillion interactions, all the things I’ve done.
The sum of my existence, the sum could have been none.

I walk out of the graveyard, still more for me to give.
Humbled by my fortune in ever having lived.     
One sad event occurring, so many years gone by.
The hand of fate deciding who would live and who would die.

Ellis Pringle Craig, 2025.

Copyright © Ellis Craig | Year Posted 2025

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