Lxii Years Old and He Still Carries a Security Blanket

LXII+ years old and he still carries a security blanket Move over Linus Van Pelt of Peanuts fame, cuz yours truly also psychologically lame since prepubescence mine noticeably long hair delivered inner comfort, yet found some classmates calling me "hippy" by name though other tormentors among them hurled expletive laced offensive insults even ethnic slurs much less tame. Absolute zero anti-bullying laws prevailed ahoy when reasonably rhyming poet just a little beastie boy "mean kids" hurtful tactics they did deploy, though one bookish lad named Donald Hoy, he rode the same bus as me, and most likely practiced magic ploy to ward off nemesis. Impossible mission to detangle mane reason why I experienced omnipotent hair reed bond neither thy father, mother nor therapist could understand or qualify outsize (obsessive/compulsive) significance well nigh much more (hyperbolically writing) blatantly mystifying and unsettling versus comprehending meaning regarding the bridge on the River Kwai, whereat these long strands emanating from scalp, I imagined them extending out into space into no fly zone, and if adored locks threatened with someone brandishing scissors one puny lad would cry. Parents did not berate, when early within mein kampf, no matter my mother did execrate obsessive compulsive thoughts did instigate long necked pencil geek son did unwittingly irritate analogous to Samson (though Delilah not my mate), I imbue power courtesy each golden lock atop me addled sub tracked pate, where fifty plus shades of gray matter houses ticky tacky psyche substrate, which doth bubble, gurgle and percolate. Only upon taking me last breath of air viz, when grim reaper delivers death, I will unroll welcome me Scottish Harris tweed mat without fanfare (for this common man), and just maybe allow, enable, and provide thee opportunity for scissors to lop off longish straggly hair subsequently repurposed into a security blanket ideally suited to create creature comfort within lair for garden variety and generic caveman, who truth be told lives very near yours truly in Schwenksville.