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Loveless Last Rites

Stranded, sorrows billow suffering sails,
Surf snaps at broken hull's plea; 'swallow me'!
Lost love, life black-white, living color pales,
Tears sew sad tapestry on stirred sea.

Surf snaps at broken hull's plea; 'swallow me',
Grief, windswept memory’s muck lines the shore.
Tears sew sad tapestry on stirred sea,
Grains grit harsh reminiscence evermore.

Grief windswept, memory's muck lines the shore,
Winds retch your name, sandblasted stinging bites.
Grains grit harsh reminiscence evermore,
Essence dying, anoint loveless last rites.

Winds retch your name sandblasted, stinging bites!
Lost love; life black-white living color pales.
Essence dying anoint loveless last rites,
Stranded sorrows billow suffering sails.


Susan Ashley 
August 3, 2017


N/A
For contest: Lost Love 2017
Sponsor:John Hamilton

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Joseph May Date: 12/22/2017 3:13:00 PM Very nicely crafted Pantoum Susan..Well written Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 12/22/2017 7:57:00 PM Thank you Joseph for visiting one of my older poems. Your lovely visit and wonderful comments are very much appreciated. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Paul Callus Date: 12/5/2017 12:08:00 PM Beautiful poetry is capable of softening the grief of love's demise, Susan! Metaphorically captivating; even in these earlier poems of yours the use of alliteration is outstanding. ~ Warm regards to you my friend. ~ paul Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 12/5/2017 4:47:00 PM Paul, your presence inspires me to reach further as I continue to develop my voice in expressing my poetry. I appreciate you, our poetry friendship and the time you take in writing the personalized, positive reinforcements you offer in your lovely comments. I've learned so much from your wonderful words. You must have been beloved by your students as a great teacher Paul. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Silent One Date: 11/9/2017 4:13:00 PM Can't believe I missed this one.. Love the first and fourth lines... excellent poetry.. Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 11/9/2017 8:51:00 PM Silent One, the last two words, especially, of your comment puts a smile on my face. Thank you for your heartwarming words of appreciation for my poetry that inspires me and fills my heart with gratitude.. ~Susan

Maria Williams Date: 8/15/2017 11:16:00 PM Absolutely love this Susan, a form of poetry that I'm sure is very difficult, but you have mastered it with ease, Brilliant...Maria Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 8/15/2017 11:29:00 PM Thank you Maria for you very kind and thoughtful comment. I'm happy you enjoyed my poem and I so appreciate your visit :)

Corwin Donovan Date: 8/4/2017 1:25:00 PM Absolutely loved it! Now, let me take some notes so I can learn how poetry is truly written... Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 8/4/2017 11:20:00 PM Hi Corwin, Thank you for reading my poem and for the wonderful comment :)

Dale Gregory Cozart Date: 8/4/2017 11:48:00 AM Beautiful. Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 8/4/2017 11:19:00 PM Hi Dale, thank you so much for stopping by to read and comment on my poem. Greatly appreciated :)