Chris Green Poet Free verse

Lost

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Some days start out really good
and then against my better judgement I look
where I know I shouldn’t but
like a cat, curiosity grabs me by the collar,
pushes my face right down in it
and I feel my heart break all over again

How can a few written words
hurt so badly
How can the sun set and darkness
arrive at 1:30 in the afternoon
How can I feel so empty inside
when I am filled with sadness

I hear myself inside screaming at me,
telling me things I already know
but don’t want to hear
“I know, quit yelling at me, I couldn’t help myself”
But I know I could, I just didn’t,
I just wouldn’t

Thank God for my hands
because I don’t know what else
would hold my head up 
at this very moment
and as I sit here knowing it’s wrong
I still look

I look around,
I know where I am. I am sitting at my 
gray Formica topped desk,
in my gray painted office
that I come to every day
but I am lost
lost in the memories,
lost in the dreams,
lost in the constant hope
lost in the failure
lost in myself
lost

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Roxane Aristy October 31, 2019 at 2:49 PM Your poem echoes how I have felt many times. I loved it all for transforming pain into beauty. I am moved by your verses, Chris. Chris Green October 31, 2019 at 3:07 PM Thank you so very much Roxane. I really appreciate you taking the time to read this and leave such a nice comment for me. I am sorry you have felt this but I think perhaps we all have at one time or the other,

Sandra Adams September 26, 2019 at 6:52 PM this one brought tears to my eyes...one can really feel the sadness and it makes me wish i could come through the screen and give you a hug... we all get lost, we just need to find our way back... :( hugs my friend... Chris Green September 27, 2019 at 7:56 AM Thank you Sandy. Just so you know, each and every one of your beautiful comments on my work is a big warm hug to me. Thank you for everything

Paul Callus September 26, 2019 at 5:05 PM It's impossible not to keep returning to where the hurt is, Chris, as your poem so clearly implies. Memories will keep on flooding in...and a gray painted office will certainly not give you a hand! ~ Regards // paul Chris Green September 27, 2019 at 7:55 AM Thanks so very much Paul for your visit and nice comment.

Brenda Chiri September 26, 2019 at 3:13 PM Chris we all have days like that! Just gotten keep your head up and pray someday it will get easier! We know it doesn't but we can only hope something changes! My dear friend I feel you! But I know nothing said helps! ;( Chris Green September 26, 2019 at 3:28 PM Thank you my friend for your kind and wonderful thoughts. You know me, it happens. I just try to write it out when it does.

Heidi Sands September 26, 2019 at 2:51 PM Some things hurt so very much as you have expressed in this poem. And when that hurt takes over it certainly is a lost feeling. Smiles sent your way :) Chris Green September 26, 2019 at 3:27 PM Thank you so very much Heidi. I appreciate you my friend.

Hello There September 26, 2019 at 2:36 PM Oh no, if I could sing, I would sing to you... feeling this. Chris Green September 26, 2019 at 2:46 PM Thank you my friend, I truly appreciate that but at the moment all I would probably hear is the blues. Though your visit has brought me a smile, so thank you again.