King Pong

Not a man among us could believe the tales as told A forty foot gorilla must be fable This jungle is so hot by day but in the night so cold It had been said our minds were quite unstable For acting on the rumours when we’re not completely sold Suggest we all deserve that ‘nutter’ label But every man among us would do anything for gold And so we’ll get that beast if we are able * Bananas in this jungle two feet long from tip to tip Maybe causing growth at faster rates And thus creating quite an evolutionary blip with massive figs and quite enormous dates So if we get the monster and the media let’s rip We’ll all be heroes back home in the states But will a forty foot gorilla sink our ageing ship And leave us clinging on to wooden crates * We found that ape and drugged him but he started to recover He screamed so loud but he was tied down well He grinned at me as though he knew that soon we would discover Something that might send us all to hell The men stepped back and did their best to hide behind each other And one man stammered through his urgent yell “You’ve got your huge gorilla, but turn round and meet it’s mother!” … It wasn’t she that made the awful smell.