Inspired Byard
You all know me as Percival Jack
But my real name is Charles Byard
So you know, it's pronounced by-yard
Living with this name has been hard
You guys are probably wondering
Where did that name originate
Certainly never heard it ever before
At least that's what most people state
Well here's my tale, every bit is true
Uncle Byard in World War One
Died a big hero and was given a medal
But he never ever carried a gun
Before the war he was incarcerated
For his nefarious safe cracking exploits
The army thought they could use his talents
At burglary he was very adroit
So Byard was released and joined the army
To make use of his safe cracking skills
Sadly, one day while defusing a bomb
My uncle, the hero was killed
Was nicknamed Jack, but won't get into that
It's what I've been called me ever since
I'm thinking of changing it to 'Inspired Byard'
But my wife will be hard to convince
'And now you know the rest of the story'
As radio man Paul Harvey used to say
I've hated that name since I was a pup
But 'Inspired Byard' is okay!
© Jack Ellison 2012
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