In Me

In Me The gray bird landed early morning, before coffee was done, cold greeting, functionary and efficient. Our service done, friends are no more and others are damaged No heroes here, just Joe’s with service done. One foot here the other there, numb at heart. Carousels of dreams circle round with no brass ring reward. No path to tell the story, would you believe, who to tell. To believe my tale, long and short, I think not. Looking forward into black, no light to see, answer me. Not wanting to move forward, only wanting to turn back - just one more time. Numb at heart, spirits abound, not wanting to go down that road, stay straight, and walk the narrow. Walking round, check here and check there, “Hay Bud ready to go home!” Home, a distant land far off, a distant memory more than the others. Safe, from Mr. Charlie dressed in black, my friend nor enemy to bother me. Why me, why here, why now. Step here, step there, a second more or less and I am no more. Why me, why here, why now. Push it back, straight and narrow, step forward into black. My heart races with the first step, than the second and a third – not so hard after all. Three suns passed since leaving the land close to down under. Each day the task to defend or die, death was busy seven suns ago. Another step away, another step into black, numb at heart afraid to call home. Not long ago I looked around seeing nothing, now I see all and fright enters me. Close the door, keep it secret, all in a day’s pay – tell no one the secrets abound. Looking forward into black, no light to see, answer me – one step, than two….