I'M the Clown of Life

I open my notebook, then i take a pen I’m supposed to write a new poem But all what is scribbled on the paper Is that drop of my tears flowing from my eyes No idea runs through my head My heart is bleeding again Too much emotions stifle my breath So much hatred burns my depth So much fears block my steps I am the clown who makeupher face with the blood of her wounds Hiding her tears with an artificial smiles acting like a fool Dressing up in color her dark bone And singing hope with her hopeless voice Everyone wants to buy my life Everyone envies the mask wearing on my face But I wonder if they want to take my sad secret garden with them I wonder if they are able to live with a deep pain 24/7 day and night I wonder if those haters have one single idea about my poor past I wonder if those jealous are ready to walk on my cold rainy path Yes I prefer to be your clown always fine Cause I’m not ready to reveal who I am I’m still weak can’t face my pain I don’t wish to let you see me cry I don’t hope to open my 24 years-old scars. I’m the clown of life who never knew what she wants I’m the clown who is lost in the valley of the dolls