Randy Johnson Poet I do not know?

I'M Eric Cartman's Father

(This is a fictional poem)

I became Eric Cartman's father after I slept with his mother.
She turned out to be a very lousy lover.
A paternity test showed Cartman's mom to be a hermaphrodite.
But I know for a fact that that's not right.
I was drinking booze when I went to South Park about ten years back.
I regret the experience because she's a whore on crack.

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