I Love My Nan

god bless her my old nan, she's blind as a bat and 91, she has a dog called winni the wisp, he's got no teeth and barks with a lisp, they both cant see me when i'm there, my nan the dog they have no hair, hey nan i'm going to make us some tea, she passed the remote for the tv, no nan i'm making a brew, a nice cup of tea for me and you. she's sat there talking to the settee, laughing and joking while i make the tea. the dog is barking at the floor, he thinks he's sat at the front door. whats wrong with the dog nan, he's looking sad, dont worry dear he's going mad. what with nan and winni the same, both barking mad and totally insane, i'm going home nan its time to go, as she struggles to reach the floor. from the settee to the door, its about 9foot 4, ive been waiting an hour she aint reached the door. the dogs gone in the opposite way, looking for nan what can i say, god bless them both i'm on my way.