I Hope You Don'T Mind Me Writing

This is the only way I know how to express myself I can't speak in person, but rhyming words helps You can see the blood on the page and hear my words crying I hope you don't mind me writing Do I share too much? Am I wrong for putting it all on display? Do I paint a beautiful picture, or is it a wall of disarray? Do I express myself well or do I need help? Sometimes I share so much I don't know where that leaves myself Nothing came easy i had to learn the hard way When the smoke clears would you burn my art away? Do you care about my rhymes or anything I even say? Am i weak because i have old wounds that are still Bleeding today? My female best friend called me a male whore and said i have a new girl every time i See her Then said, you're a great guy, but i wouldn't want to Be her You'll give her a Month of great sex, But you'll leave as soon as things might get serious But the sad thing is, you're losing out yourself over something that could be a great experience She doesn't know that's something that keeps me up at night I cry into my pillow wishing i had the ability to show everything I have inside My parents choosing alcohol over me, and putting me in foster care means I keep my heart to myself Because you all want the finished product and don't know how my scars felt I feel everyone is attacking me so of course I get defensive I keep all these thoughts inside until I pen it When I put it in poetry people think I do it with ease But don't realise I beat the pen against my heart until it bleeds I've built a shield around my heart that no longer lets pain in Which means everyone is locked out, but one or 2 are chained in Because I hadn't moved on from them before I built it Maybe there was life in those relationships yet, but I killed it This is the only way I know how to express myself I can't speak in person, but rhyming words helps You can see the blood on the page and hear my words crying I hope you don't mind me writing