Paige Turner Poet Rhyme

I Heart My Stool Chart

I have to admit I’ve got a confession
About my unhealthy obsession
Other kids love pop stars with all their heart
For me it’s the Bristol Stool chart

There’s seven different types of poo
With pictures that give me a clue
to how long the poo’s been in my bowel
Poos that’s both fresh and some that’s foul

Each morning once I get out of bed
For breakfast I’ll have brown bread
The chart is a handy tool
To identify your type of stool

Now I’ve decided to tell
You about the different poos that smell
Cos it’s clear that the Bristol stool chart
Can also indicate your type of fart

Type 1 is as hard as a nut
And stays longest in the gut
Type 2 is a sausagy lump
That’s hard to squeeze out your rump

Then there’s types 3 and type 4
These are the poos I adore
These are the poos I prefer to make
A cracked sausage or smooth like a snake

Types 5 and 6 are easier to pass
Blobby or fluffy ones from your ass
Type 7 is the worst of all
It gushes like a waterfall 
  
So now you’ve got all the scoop
On all the different types of poop
I love identifying my poo and type of fart
The Bristol Stool chart fills my heart

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Jan Allison June 21, 2023 at 11:23 AM OMG Paige this is a Poop Poem of the century - a Massive fave. I wish I had thought of the idea... but you are not going to nick my Queen of Poop Crown - I'm not ready to relinquish it yet! So glad you joined soup! hugs Jan xx

I Am Anaya June 21, 2023 at 10:23 AM A healthy gut needs high protein, just reading up on that, bone broth helps for a smoother bowel movement. Happiness is keeping a Bristol stool chart write on!