Jan Allison Poet Rhyme

Notes About The Poem

I Fell Apart When You Died

My silent tears 
        fell like a raging waterfall 
      You were my companion for many years 
        came to heal should I call
  Old age approached; you became so weak and so frail
  but it never stopped you wagging your bushy tail!
    In time your heart began to fail
  as you took your last breath, I stroked your floppy ears.

FICTION POEM FOR CONTEST


Writing Challenge, June 2019, Crumbling Rhyme Poetry Contest

Sponsored By Dear Heart

6/10/19

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

David Drowley July 7, 2019 at 4:56 PM Jan, Congratulations on your win! You captured the sense of loss so perfectly at the close of crumbling. David

Early Jae July 1, 2019 at 2:29 PM Congrats for your win with this emotional piece! I shed a tear for my childhood dog :)

Constance La France June 30, 2019 at 3:31 PM Jan, congratulations on your win in my writing challenge with this wonderful write, although fiction you have the skill in making us believe your words and sorry for my delay in visiting, love the quote too ~

Warren Doll June 30, 2019 at 3:25 PM Jan, sad and so well written about the loss of a pet companion. If you have not gone thru it, you don't understand. It's not losing your dog; it's losing a member of your family. Congratulations on your well deserved win, All the best~ Warren

Andrea Dietrich June 25, 2019 at 11:40 AM oh I really relate to this one, as I have had several beloved pets die on me. Congrats on your well deserved win, my good friend. I am going to be leaving in an hour with my sister. She and her husband are on their way to Utah this moment and I am just doing all the comments I can before leaving. Gotta work on contest poems in the car!!!

Susan Ashley June 24, 2019 at 8:01 PM Oh, your poignant poem truly strums my heartstrings, Jan. This is so beautifully done. Congratulations on your excellent win. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Anne-Lise Andresen June 11, 2019 at 1:09 PM - My oldest is 10 years now ... and the health not on top ... it will be a sad day when she dies ... - A touching and lovely poem, Jan :) - Best wishes in the contest - hugs // Anne-Lise :)

Jennifer Proxenos June 11, 2019 at 11:15 AM This is heartbreaking Jan - a waterfall of tears - although fiction I see below - how many of us have gone through this whilst our faithful pets take their last breath - a very sad, but wonderful write! Hugs, Jennifer. Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 11:17 AM Thanks so much Jennifer - taken from experiences of friends, its truly is heartbreaking to lose a treasured pet:-( hugs Jan xx

Winged Warrior June 11, 2019 at 8:53 AM I'm crumbling with tears (fictionally)...great entry Jan...top of the winners' list my friend...^WW^...{*J*} Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 11:01 AM thanks so much ^WW^ am so glad its fiction for me but I know many can relate:-( hugs Jan xx

Brenda Chiri June 10, 2019 at 10:31 PM Beautifully done Jan!;) Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 11:00 AM Thanks Brenda:-) hugs Jan xx

Lindsay Laurie June 10, 2019 at 7:42 PM G'day Jan … may be fictional, but boy oh boy, so many of us have gone through this stage and your verse will bring back the memory - thank you Jan - Lindsay Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 10:52 AM It's so tough when you lose a pet - I based this on experiences of friends:-( hugs Jan xx

Ilene Bauer June 10, 2019 at 4:17 PM you could have fooled me, jan! convincingly sad... Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 10:50 AM Thanks Ilene, I have an allergy to animal fur so not had a pet since I was very much younger:-( hugs Jan xx

Ann Gilmour June 10, 2019 at 3:45 PM Oh dear Jan, this cleverly written piece sums up how most of us feel when our dear pet dies, so sad. Good luck in the contest Jan, with kindest thoughts Ann xx Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 10:50 AM Thanks for dropping by Ann, hope you are feeling better now:-) I've had tension headaches last 2 days so not spent too much time replying to comments and fine now - think once hubby is home it will be easier:-) :-) hugs jan xx

Tom Cunningham June 10, 2019 at 1:47 PM Devastating when you lose a faithful pet, they do.become part of the family. Well.written Jan. Good luck. Tom Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 10:47 AM They sure do Tom:-( hugs Jan xx

Maureen McGreavy Pigeon Tart June 10, 2019 at 10:10 AM I embraced every bit of my dog's life, including her death. Surprised the vet staff refusing to leave her to do the paperwork before, and did not need any time with her when it was done. I've had the privilege to care for several old dogs, a doggie death doula ;) sweet ink, xomo Jan Allison June 11, 2019 at 10:47 AM aww Mo I heave tears reading your comment, my poem is fiction for me but I know many pet owners who have struggled to come to terms with the loss of a loyal dog:-( hugs Jan xx