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I Blamed You

Poet: Ken Jordan
Poem: I Blamed You
Edited by: Sparkle Jordan
written: June/2014

I have blamed
you -

for
the bad
choice's

that I've
made -

I've blamed
you -

when  I get
upset,

and
turn into
a
fiery rage -

Without peace
in my
heart,

life has
been

like
a volcano,

I boil

and

explode -

I've blamed
you,
for my
mental madness -

I say,

"You made 
me 
this way!"

Yeah!
I say,

"You make
me do 
the
bad things
I do."

I know
when I say
these things,

that
it's far
from
the truth -

I just don't
want
to admit

to
the
wrong I've 
done -

But

after
it's
been  said,

and 
the smoke
has cleared -

I know
that
you're not
the one
to
blame -

I feel guilty
 for 
the things
I've said

and 
done

in the
heat
of
rage -

I can't
take those
words back,

or
the heartache 
I've cost -

God,
is our 
only healer

and
through
forgiveness,

God, 
will heal
our pain -

It's going
to 
require
continuous 
work
on myself.....

to stay
in balance
with my
heart -

and
to
be patient,

not to
re-act 
through the rain
and
storm -

otherwise,
I know
that

anger
will 
return -

It's a
vicious circle -

and the 
very
moment

that I feel
it 

conjuring 
up
inside of
me,

I'm gonna
say:

"Not today!....
not today!

you will not
instigate 

your rage,

to
overcome
me -

I know 
the
truth -

a lie
can't stand
in
the light -

I want you
to
know,

you are
my
rock,

I must honor
and
respect you 
always -

Got
to ground
myself,

and
work for
peace,

wellness 
is the 
key -

From
now
forward,

I pray
for my release,

from

 blame, guilt,
and 
shame -

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Casarah Nance

Date: 6/28/2014 7:23:00 PM

It is a struggle sometimes to keep the tongue from speaking in anger, I sense that battle in you, and it is a common one. peace comes from prayer. :)

Ken Jordan
Date: 6/28/2014 9:58:00 PM

Hello Casarah, thank you as always for your comments on my work. I am a fan of your writing, stay strong.