I Became An Explorer

Shortly after the Internet discovered itself, I set out to be an explorer; not of land and water, but a finder of the odd and peculiar. My first inclination was to search for antiquarian artifacts, but lacking the knowledge of said artifacts, I thought to be a ‘picker’ and a junk collector, or even a mildly addicted hoarder. Knowing little of buying and selling, and next to no space for storing anything, I had to re-think the whole exploring business. Lacking funds to travel far, I commenced to explore myself. Having only a limited aptitude for self-awareness, I sought the aid of many spiritual agencies. Lacking the sensitivity to receive their help, I turned to drinking and writing poetry. Lacking anyone else to blame but myself, I determined to blame the Internet, especially Internet Explorer.