How To Speak Italian
First Marco Polo your soul - don’t ask.
Shake your noodle until it transcends to pasta,
Twist your noodle, it will only hurt for a while
soon it will become your mother tongue.
Recite the hundred words Italians have
for pork, ham, and bacon daily,
never again just say pork, ham, and bacon.
Imagine that your cheap olive oil is champagne,
Lightly sprinkle your vocabulary -
not too oily.
Tomatoes and cheese’s offer you
endless ways to speak with our mouth full
while still sounding refined.
Say ‘Pizza’ as it were in fact
a much longer word.
Swagger as you babble from the top
of your proudly Italianate lungs.
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