Rachel Hart Poet Free verse

Holiday Spirit

[sigh]
        disappointment, go on honey, make that
        appointment, it's out of our hands now.
                                            "i'm sorry"- i 
could have said, meaning it to the point my chin
would tremble.
                                      "i forgive you"- you
could have said, eyes glistening with false truth, like
the look you wore telling me of santa.
i'd take it.
i'd break it into pieces, small enough for me to carry
with me, look back on, touch, feel, run my hands
over & around forever.
                     never is when that happened.
                     which is also the same time 
                     our eyes met.
       i want you to care. i dare you to take that plunge
with me, as i am frightened too. this isn't easy. couldn't be.
shouldn't be. that would take the meaning out of it.
                                                    hello?
         my echo tickled my spine,
                                                   goodbye?
         i promised myself that i'd be fine.
                                                  [silence]
penance. pent up guilt. let this loose. punish me now,
i'll punish me now.
                            you were the one that showed me how.
                            broke your own back trying to break
                            your own back. 
the apple does not fall far from the tree.

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