Heart Thoughts

Clouded by thoughts of doubt Wondering what things are about. Sifting through the layers of mental sand Looking to Understand. Bringing things to a head Feeling Feelings of dread Not sure what I am wanting But wanting something Having real answers to bring peace of mind Finding out that really I have been so blind The battle is not over, feeling the waters receding back Knowing that we have took a step forward, now knowing all the facts My heart is full of pain, to many things, to many times The dread of starting all over again. I just wanted to love him, I just want him to care Nothing else, just acceptance, but it is seem it cannot be there. I need to stop this roller coaster ride I need to have some real peace inside So I walked away, I made the break It was hard to do, but it was for my sake Time will tell if I did the right thing The pain of this love sure makes my heart sting But I have heard it before and I will hear it again If he belongs to me, he will return again. But not like before, single minded and sure He will know beyond a shadow of a doubt why he is here