He First Loved Me
A vessel made for ultimate good,
God fashioned me in His image,
Not knowing my intrinsic value
I sold myself for a mess of pottage.
Being marred in the potter's hand,
but always His beloved daughter,
He made me again another vessel,
still created for good, but much better.
Just as Esau sold himself long ago,
ignorantly, I found I did the same.
I fulfilled lusts of the flesh and mind.
Fleshly pleasures never brought gain.
In sugary treats, the beggarly elements,
I hid from my fearful, negative feelings.
Tribulation revealed my heart's treasure.
I understood little of God's dealings.
Not loving myself for all my failures,
I'd make myself perfect to find love;
An erroneous goal to bring me glory.
All glory belonged to heaven above.
Why didn't He just give up on me?
It was a "wonder" I often questioned.
Meanwhile, I discovered His mercy,
patience, forgiveness and compassion.
"You finally found out how", He said.
His "words", before it all was finished,
gave me added courage to keep trying.
My determination was not diminished.
"Find out how to do what", I asked?
"To have peace; trust and obey."
He knew it alluded me at the time.
There was so much more to convey.
Allowing me to suffer consequences,
I began slowly to walk in the light.
His love, while pondering His words,
guided me in the darkness of night.
Little did I know His meaning of,
"Stop just dipping in your toes!"
"Immerse yourself"; then light came.
I'd find help in His word for my woes.
Immersing myself in His Holy word,
I found grace to help in time of need.
The more often I immersed myself,
I grew toward the light with speed.
No longer are the beggarly elements
A place for me to hide from negativity.
Embracing love for Him, self and others.
I'm no longer blind but now I finally see.
In the light of his indescribable love,
perfectionism didn't leave much room
for His work and ultimately His glory.
His grace and mercy can now resume.
Copyright © Charlene Mccutcheon | Year Posted 2017
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