Hansel and Gretel's Surprise

Here's the story of Hansel and Gretel But, again, not like they said Their's was way too humdrum So, here's my version, instead First, their father wasn't a woodcutter He worked at the laundromat He took quarters from the scrub boards To make change and things like that Hansel and Gretel weren't children They were midgets from the Wizard of Oz But this wasn't their first story They first worked for a guy named Claus Anyway, the witch was really a witch That part of the story is true But, this next part will be a surprise And this, I promise you Hansel and Gretel had been casing the joint To rob that poor witch clean They were the meanest two kid-lookin' midgets That anyone had ever seen Now, the witch was planning on eating them Well, cause, that's what witches do You really can't blame her for her cravings She's just tired of pork rines and stew She invited them in, they played some cards It was time to execute her plan She asked Hansel to check the oven And she pushed him in the pan Gretel was watching and knew what to do As she jumped on the witch's back Hansel pulled out his crossbow It was time for him to attack This next part is weird, you may not believe But one day, maybe, you will For while the battle was raging strong Thru the door walked Dr Phil "Can't we all just get along?" he said As he proceded to stop the fight It took him only a minute or two To determine which one was right They agreed to disagree And go their separate ways For Dr Phil had come to the rescue And, again, he saved the day