Jack Jordan Poet Haiku

Haiku 42 - 1,2,3,4,5

1
		a noiseless moment 
		he writes in his diary
		incessant snow  
			
			
			2
		every day he hoped   
		every day she avoided…  
		waning moon
			
					
			3
		his need for love 
		he opened his careless mouth 
		oak tree, splintered
				
			
			4
		words that she heard
		anger and bewilderment
		forest inferno
			
			
			5
		his trembling sadness 
		enclosed in silence and time
		incessant snow
			
			
			Fin

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Sara Kendrick May 4, 2013 at 6:11 PM Interesting work that you have penned in these..I love the play on words with emotion...Sara Jack Jordan May 4, 2013 at 7:37 PM Thanks, Sara. I had fun writing it... Jack

Timothy Hicks April 29, 2013 at 12:19 AM I've responded to your comments on my work. I wanted to say I'd love to try haikai, but I can't think of a practical way to do it on the soup. The only thing that half way makes sense (in my mind) is Soup Mail message bouncing back and forth between other members. Each time the message gets longer and longer, extending the poem. While at the same time, though, that kinda puts pressure on people to think of an add-on quickly... Hmmmm... Jack Jordan April 29, 2013 at 7:42 AM That's sort of what I thought too. Doing so would necessitate having a list of writers beforehand, publishing the results every time a new haiku was added (I'm not sure where. Maybe on both of our pages.), and editing none of them. we could write the first and last. I suggest one of the shorter forms such as shisan (12 writers; http://www.ahapoetry.com/renga.htm)... Jack

Delysia Hendricks April 28, 2013 at 8:56 PM This I call mastery of the haiku. Each one can stand on its own, yet they're an integral part of the whole. Lovely work, Jack. :) Jack Jordan April 28, 2013 at 9:11 PM That's very kind of you. I really appreciate the comment... Jack

Ale A A April 28, 2013 at 5:34 PM I always admire those that wrote Haiku saying so much with so little. The real poets. Jack Jordan April 28, 2013 at 7:44 PM Thank you. That's very kind... Jack

Anne-Lise Andresen April 28, 2013 at 2:19 PM - I see what you mean, Jack - they go together like a "haiku story" - well done! - (I posted a Haiku today) - Have a great new week! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

Timothy Hicks April 28, 2013 at 9:46 AM Kinda went full circle on me. I was wrong in my guess, but it's still a very well written piece. A journal piece filled with great sadness. I wonder what you could accurately call this? Each individual haiku works on it's own, yet at the same time it forms a sorta story format. I've always wanted to try haikai (the origins of haiku), but you need several poets to join you... Jack Jordan April 28, 2013 at 9:57 AM That sounds like an interesting idea...