Growing up

When growing up I remember being told that I will see all when I grow old, that I will feel both the heat and the cold. For once in my head, I thought that would be great. I just could not wait for that date. I wanted to be an adult without a doubt. I was a child, not knowing what it was all about running out of patience waiting to finally spout. That was the stage I could not wait to explore, till the day I finally stepped on that door. For a while it was good, all was perfect. Suddenly, bit by bit I started losing respect. Confusion began but I never thought of such an effect. I felt old enough, became a leader of a squad Whenever parents warned me, I would just nod. Knowing exactly what I was doing, was inappropriate Had my heart filled with hate After some time, I felt uncomfortable in that RULE. A rule of being known for bad behaviour The load was now a bit heavier. Wanted to change as I had lost so much in school. THE SQUAD laughed and called me a fool. I swayed my hand on them and focused on my name, which I had ruined and filled with shame. Now, even though I have left all that behind. all I did still replays on my mind. Could not see what I was doing though I was never blind. For some memories I laugh and for some I cry Because I hate growing up and only a few know why