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Grief


I beseech the shards of my shattered self,
as recollections collect with a jagged edge,
for a softened reflection of a dream in smithereens
to sheath this sunken cheeked shadow
lost in the mirrored fragments 
of hollow-eyed tears.



Susan Ashley
February 12, 2019



~ Sixth Place ~
Contest: May 2019 Premier 4  (Max 14 Lines)
Sponsor: Brian Strand


~ Fifth Place ~
Contest: Capture That Emotion
Sponsor: Nina Parmenter

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Kurt Ravidas

Date: 7/29/2019 7:01:00 PM

Wow, the alliterations crunch like broken glass under feet! Bravo, Susan.

Susan Ashley
Date: 7/29/2019 10:02:00 PM

Oh, I can hear it! I never noticed it before until I read your illuminating comments. Now it is me that has the luxury to bask in the light of your glowing words, Kurt. Your wonderful and perception thoughts are a thrill to receive. Thank you my inspiring friend. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

L. J. Carber

Date: 5/15/2019 7:43:00 AM

Congrats Susan-- that 1st line is especially powerful!

Susan Ashley
Date: 5/15/2019 7:54:00 PM

L.J., I relish your wonderful visit and heartwarming congrats. Thank you and warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Maureen McGreavy

Date: 5/13/2019 12:41:00 PM

Back with congratulations Lovely! Hugs n' love! xomo

Susan Ashley
Date: 5/13/2019 10:22:00 PM

I relish your return visit and heartwarming congrats, Mo. Thank you my lovely! Warmest wishes and hugs to you always.. ~Susan <3

P.S. AWTRY

Date: 5/13/2019 10:34:00 AM

Congratulations Susan on your placement in Brian's contest with this heart-rending write! (love all the sounds you wove together in this!)

Susan Ashley
Date: 5/13/2019 10:19:00 PM

Your wonderful visit is heartwarming, P.S. It’s always so nice to see you here. Thank you for your uplifting comments and kind congrats, my lovely friend. You are truly appreciated. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Gershon Wolf

Date: 5/13/2019 9:44:00 AM

Back with congrats again on your placement in Brian's contest. As predicted, you keep 'kicking poetry derriere,' my friend. LOL. Write on, Susan! Best wishes always, Gershon

Susan Ashley
Date: 5/13/2019 10:26:00 PM

As predicted, your heartwarming comments keep bringing bouquets of smiles, Gershon :)) You have quite the talent for that! Your return visit and heartwarming congrats are deeply appreciated, as is your wonderful friendship. Warmest wishes always, my dear friend.. ~Susan

Line Gauthier

Date: 5/13/2019 8:54:00 AM

Congrats on your win, Susan. Well penned.

Susan Ashley
Date: 5/13/2019 10:20:00 PM

Thank you for your wonderful comments, Line, and kind congrats. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Robertina B.

Date: 3/13/2019 1:44:00 PM

Congratulations on your win, my dear friend.. So wonderfully expressed.. A shiny gem!! As always your talent glistens .. A fave for me! Many blessings to you!

Susan Ashley
Date: 4/5/2019 5:56:00 PM

Thank you for your truly valued comments, your fav and kind congrats, dear Robertina. My apologies for my late reply (the whole family had the flu in March - one after the other..). Your gracious visit and wonderful friendship is most appreciated. Warmest wishes and blessings always.. ~Susan

Connie Marcum Wong

Date: 3/13/2019 9:57:00 AM

Excellent Susan! Congrats on your win! xxoo : )

Susan Ashley
Date: 4/5/2019 5:54:00 PM

Thank you for your truly valued comments and kind congrats, dear Connie. My apologies for my late reply. Your gracious visit and wonderful friendship is most appreciated. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Bernard Chan

Date: 2/23/2019 3:30:00 PM

Awesome lines! The shards of shattered self, recollections with a jagged edge, sunken cheeked shadow and hollow-eyed tears . . . You've captured grief to haunting effect, Susan. Loved it.

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/28/2019 8:28:00 PM

I'm thrilled to receive this wonderful praise from a talented poet, such as yourself, Bernard. Your precious comments are uplifting and truly appreciated and I'm so pleased you enjoyed my poem. Warmest wishes always, my friend.. ~Susan

Paul Callus

Date: 2/16/2019 8:02:00 AM

Excellent...beautifully expressed, Susan! Each line and each word are meant to convey the pain of an aching heart. The letter 's' runs like a sharp blade throughout your poem, denoting the slashed effects of grief. Congratulations on this fine win. ~ Warm regards & hugs // paul

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/18/2019 12:32:00 PM

Paul, my dear friend, I'm so delighted by your wonderful presence and your beautiful comments. Both are a pleasure to receive as well as your kind congrats. Thank you for your inspiring and enthralling critique. Warmest wishes always my wonderful friend.. ~Susan

Robert Lindley

Date: 2/14/2019 7:51:00 AM

As always dear friend your verses are exceptional... A fav...

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/14/2019 6:31:00 PM

Thank you for your wonderful comments and your fav, my dear friend. Your gracious presence and kindness are deeply appreciated, Robert. Warmest wishes always my inspiring friend.. ~Susan

Nina Parmenter

Date: 2/14/2019 1:56:00 AM

I was delighted to read this one in my contest Susan, and even more whoop-whoop delighted when I finalised and saw it was you! I shouldn’t have been surprised though - such dense, rich, masterful imagery! Congratulations on your well deserved place!

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/14/2019 6:38:00 PM

Nina, I am honored by my poem’s placement in your wonderful contest and thrilled to be among the distinguished poets/poetesses on your winner’s list. Thank you for your delightful comments and for your lovely congrats, your contest was a joy to write for. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Gershon Wolf

Date: 2/13/2019 10:06:00 PM

Ah, first time I've come across a 'dream in smithereens,' my poetic friend. It may be the last time too, as I imagine that you are going to pick up the 'shards of your shattered self' and kick some more poetry derriere again!! Congrats on your placement in the contest, Susan, and warmest winter wishes. ~ Gershon

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/14/2019 6:42:00 PM

You bring bouquets of smiles whenever your gracious presence makes the scene on my poetry page, Gershon. Thank you for your wonderful comments, I relish your thoughts always, and for your kind congrats. Warmest wishes my dear friend.. ~Susan

Beata Agustin

Date: 2/13/2019 9:15:00 PM

So well-expressed! Congrats! Thanks for sharing your talent. God bless you.

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/14/2019 6:28:00 PM

Thank you for your lovely visit, Beata. Your heartwarming comments and kind congrats are truly appreciated. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 2/13/2019 7:56:00 PM

this is fantastic writing. Such great use of sound!! Big congrats on your well deserved win.

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 8:01:00 PM

Your esteemed comments fill me with delight, Andrea. Thank you for sharing your precious thoughts and for your kind congrats. Warmest wishes always, dear poetess.. ~Susan

Laura Leiser

Date: 2/13/2019 4:38:00 PM

Oh so excellent, Susan! You hit it out of the ballpark with this gem! Congrats on your win! :)

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 7:58:00 PM

Thank you for your uplifting comments, Laura, and for your kind congrats. Both are truly appreciated, my friend. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Line Gauthier

Date: 2/13/2019 4:02:00 PM

Congrats on your win, Susan. Well done.

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 7:54:00 PM

Thank you, Line, for your return visit and kind congrats. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

JAN ALLISON

Date: 2/13/2019 3:58:00 PM

such a poignant piece Susan, many congrats on your win:-) hugs Jan xx

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 7:53:00 PM

Thank you, Jan, for your gracious visit and wonderful comments, both are truly appreciated, as are your congrats as well. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Andrew Fairchild

Date: 2/13/2019 12:11:00 PM

'as recollections collect with a jagged edge'. Cuts deep, grief does. Gut-wrenching power in this one.

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 7:53:00 PM

Thank you, Andrew, for your touching comments. I appreciate both your kind visit and your wonderful sentiments. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

CayCay Jennings

Date: 2/13/2019 11:59:00 AM

I say yes, yes, yes! Very well written, great word choices, Susan. Hey - I watched the Patriots take it and thought of you during the Super Bowl. New England must be happy, everyone, collectively happy (let's pretend.) Again, an awesome write. Poetry hugs ... CayCay

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 7:49:00 PM

Your visit is a delight, CayCay, as are your precious comments. I'm so pleased that you enjoyed my poem, and yes, I was so pleased that the Patriots won the Super Bowl, as was everyone else in my family, so it was very much a collective happiness around here in my small neck of the woods :)) Thank you for your uplifting words, my lovely friend. I hope all is well.. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Arturo Michael

Date: 2/13/2019 7:56:00 AM

Hollow-eyed tears worn away by stabbing pain....A lot of grief here...Well done

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 6:33:00 PM

Indeed, dramatic grief! Thank you, Arturo, for your lovely visit and kind sentiments. Your comments are a pleasure to receive. I hope all is well with you, mon ami. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Lawrence Sharp

Date: 2/12/2019 10:26:00 PM

Brief, poetic, beautifully written; excellent poem, Susan, fave,

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 6:29:00 PM

Thank you, Lawrence, for your gracious visit and uplifting comments. Both are truly appreciated, as well as the added bonus of your fave. Warmest wishes always my inspiring friend.. ~Susan

charles messina

Date: 2/12/2019 9:12:00 PM

It doesn't take you many words to make a beautiful poem, Susan. Grief is something we are all born with, only the strong overcome it. Good grief (lol) Warmest wishes my dear friend. ~Charlie

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 6:25:00 PM

Hello my charming friend, I delight in your wonderful visit and appreciate your inspiring comments. Thank you, dear Charlieku, for your heartwarming kindness. Warmest wishes always my dear friend.. ~Susan

Line Gauthier

Date: 2/12/2019 7:54:00 PM

Wow - poignant poem, Susan.

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/13/2019 6:22:00 PM

Thank you, Line, for your wonderful comments and kind visit. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

Tom Cunningham

Date: 2/12/2019 3:56:00 PM

Grief so well described in.your verse Susan. Good luck. Tom

Susan Ashley
Date: 2/12/2019 7:18:00 PM

Thank you, Tom, for your gracious visit and wonderful comments, both are truly appreciated, my friend. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan

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Grief